R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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