I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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