Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I believe in your delicious
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