K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
