We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize