he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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