you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
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