she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
