After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
