john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
