they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
