let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
