Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize