i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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