it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
