the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
North Korea, Best Korea!
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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