so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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