Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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