Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize