He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize
