smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
