So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize