She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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