i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
