Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
