Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Randomize
