But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
