Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
