We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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