oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
