Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
