The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
