Those balls look pretty dangerous.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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