I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
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