That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Life is so much better after having sex.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
