Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
