So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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