Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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