she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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