I don't usually arrange sex via text message
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
