Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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