i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
we made out on top of his cat.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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