google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
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