If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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