i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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