i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
