remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Porn is love you can see.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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