Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
