just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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