Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
