She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
