she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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